As I mentioned in an earlier post, so many people upon hearing about our infertility, suggest adoption (like we hadn’t thought of it ourselves?).  Alas, they mean well (I think), but do they realize that adoption is a monumental undertaking all of its own?  Granted, adopting a child in need of a home is a beautiful thing, it only comes after tons of paperwork, legal explorations, buckets of money spent, and heart-felt soul searching.  It can also involve one or more home studies, where your life and relationship are put under a magnifying glass, and it is determined if you will make “fit” parents—something no pregnant fourteen-year-old has to do.  After all we went through with fertility treatments we felt like we had done enough to have kids.  When is enough, well, enough?  Most people won’t have to try so hard to have kids.  They will never have to answer that question.  And just because we didn’t adopt, doesn’t mean we didn’t really want to have kids, it just means we drew a line.  It also doesn’t mean that we don’t still grieve the loss of the kind of family we had hoped for.

“Childless not by choice” doesn’t seem to quite fit.  After all, we could adopt a child if we really wanted to…but perhaps, “Childless by Exhaustion” is a better phrase.  I am so curious—does anyone else have any ideas for a phrase that fits?  If so, please suggest…